Friday, November 19, 2010

The Downfall of the "Free Gazette Man"?

Of late, there has been something wrong with my "Free Gazette Man".

It had gotten to the point where I walked to the metro in eager anticipation of an ingenious sales pitch. Some days I even WANTED to read the Gazette (Well, mostly Wednesdays when the food and life section comes out...and the free gazette man doesn't work on Saturdays).

But this year that I didn't even dress up for Hallowe'en! Why? Basically this brilliant man who tells me to clean my windows, give educational gifts to friends, and convinces me to dress up as a newspaper for Hallowe'en seems to be a little depressed and angry. Yes, the weather is a little chillier and I wouldn't want to be outside for half the day either, but once I slightly reached out my hand for a newspaper and he thought I was waving him off, and he scowled. He scowled! Another time he thrust the newspaper out in front of me angrily and I was so taken aback that I moved out of the line of fire and didn't take the newspaper I'd been thinking about taking for the last 2 minutes. Now I'm a little scared to go to the metro. It's as if I've offended him (well, maybe more so as if "people" have offended him since he doesn't know who I am) and I'm doing my traditional conflict avoidance thing. It's good for getting me on my bike and off the metro, but soon I'm going to have to see this man more often as the weather gets less bike-friendly, and I'm a little nervous.

What if I miss a great recipe or a great food article because I chose not to take the Gazette just to avoid a mini-confrontation with this man? The way I see it, I have two options:

1. I can be a little stealth, and take a newspaper from the stack by the doors instead of taking one directly from him. It's not as though he works on commission or anything.

2. I can remember to read the paper online instead, but then this slightly angry man is stuck outside a little longer each day, waiting for all his newspapers to be taken. Maybe at 5pm he just leaves the extras and goes home. Does he get fired if they don't all get handed out? I don't want him to get fired...I just want him to stop scowling at me.

So, what to do, what to do?

Here's the best idea I can come up with:

I'll avoid him when I see him, my Gazette Man, and then when I see an unguarded stack by the door I'll take 3 or more to make up for the days when I don't take one. It's a horrible waste and completely negates the point of handing the newspaper out for free, but he wouldn't care, I wouldn't care, and we both get to our destinations a little happier, maybe (me to the metro, him to his home).

Yes?

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